189810

Joke of the Day

"What happens when the fog clears in California? UCLA"

"If you plan a surprise party for me, I'll freak out that you mixed friends from all the separate facets of my life, and start killing people"

"Decadent: Posessing only ten teeth."

"Daughter 1: Dad, I'm lesbian. Daughter 2: Dad, I'm also a lesbian. Father: Isn't there anyone in this family who likes dick? Son: Yeah dad, I do."

"I make a mean sandwich. The key is to use racist cheese."

"According to the law it's not appropriate to put a bounty on my boss. I actually thought it showed great initiative and leadership."

"Happy Fourh of July ""Hey England, Happy Fourh of July."" ""Where's the T?"" ""We threw it in the harbor."" Merica."

"Two dogs are going on a walk down the street They walk past a few parking meters and one dog says to the other, ""Hey, check it out! Pay toilets!"""

"Why did the chicken go around the world? Because his name was Marco Pollo.."

"I have enough money to live comfortably the rest of my life if I die next thursday"