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Joke of the Day

"Lately I've gotten into donkey porn... ...it really gets MEEE OFFFFF!"

"Why do people choose to become bakers? Because they knead the dough."

"I put my earbuds on just like everybody else. Frantically as someone approaches."

"My Pet Mouse Elvis Died Today He got caught in a trap."

"There's a thin line distinguishing ""Heroes"" from ""Herpes"""

"Irish wedding vs. Irish funeral (Possibly offensive? Naah...) What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk."

"[on first date] Let me get that for you. *holds door open* ""May I help you, sir?"" Yes, my lady would like your finest soft taco supreme..."

"How is Santa like a paedophile? They both leave children's bedrooms with empty sacks."

"-I love you Juan. -I love you too bae , lets make love. -Im afraid. -But why bae? -what if I get pregnant? - I can promise you that wont happen Fernando."

"A 2007 study showed that for high school students graduating in the US, 4/3 did not know how to properly use fractions. It might be an outdated study though."