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Joke of the Day

"It's called ""courting"" a girl because you're supposed to take them to a basketball court and dunk on them repeatedly I hope"

"*kisses new boss on lips as I say goodbye at the end of my first day*"

"Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda-pressing"

"I wrote a song about a tortilla... Well, actually, it's more of a wrap."

"I wrote a song for a Tortilla. Well, it's more of a Wrap."

"How much Blow Can Charlie Sheen Do?.. ..... Enough to kill 2 and 1/2 Men"

"For $60, this printer ink had better be hand squeezed out of endangered squids."

"A wine tasting? Where people SPIT OUT precious wine?! Sure, maybe we could go to the humane society and watch them put puppies to sleep too."

"[I remove my bike helmet, but my toupee comes off with it] ""I'm sorry guys, is there something funny about safety?"""

"The Steel Band by Lydia Dustbin"