189631

Joke of the Day

"What did Abe Lincoln say to the judge when he asked how he pleas? I'm in a cent."

"I fucked a girls butthole."

"So a guy came into a bar... No... wait, it was a horse. So a guy came into a horse..."

"Man comes running in the door at home all excited. ""Honey, pack your bags! I won the lottery"" she asks ""should I pack for the beach or the mountains?"" I don't care. Just get the fuck out."

"Sometimes I feel like Valentine's Day was invented by a guy who had way too many chocolate covered strawberries."

"Knock Knock ! [nsfw ish] ""Whos there?"" ""Wilma"" ""Wilma whom?"" ""Wilma Dickfit."""

"What's E.T short for? Because he's got small legs"

"HR: The delivery job is yours. Me: Great! HR: Do u have a reliable car? Me: Yes. HR: Model? Me: A little in college. How is that relevant?"

"Wait, women get the WHOLE DAY? Is that in every country? It's night where I am is it over can it be about me again"

"A man goes to the doctors... and says ""I think I'm a moth"" The Doctor says, ""I think you need to see a psychiatrist about that"". The man says, ""Yeah I was on my way but I saw your light was on""."