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Joke of the Day

"Well your honor, I thought handing her the curling iron while she was showering would get her ready faster."

"Commonwealth Games: Building unrealistic goals and dreams for British athletes going to the olympics since 1930."

"Canada plans on removing the polar bear from the Tonnie. And replace it with two gay deer, it's called two fucking bucks."

"What's a golf club's favorite type of music? Swing!"

"Neutrino Knock Knock Joke Neutrino Knock Knock"

"There are certain people who assume that I'm intelligent. These people aren't aware that I cannot tear off perforated paper."

"What do you call a group of sorority girls/fraternity guys standing in a circle? A round of applause ...because they all have the clap."

"My college advisor asked me if I've ever been abroad Nope, I've been a man my whole life."

"I'm tired of this one night stand mentality in college... I have multiple lamps and alarm clocks, I need at least two night stands."

"Why don't Mexicans cross the border in groups? Because the border says ""No TRESpassing"""