189408

Joke of the Day

"Two drunk Man Two drunks are in a bar. First one: ""My wife is an angel"" Second one: ""You are lucky! Mine is still alive."""

"Whenever I get a stack of job applications, I throw half of them in the garbage I don't want unlucky people working for me"

"What do you call a computer that sings? A Dell"

"An ISIS attack wouldn't do any damage to Chicago What's one more pot hole?"

"Ever see a jack ass wrapped in plastic? If not... Look at your drivers license."

"For job interviews, your best bet is to dress as a pizza delivery person, march in and say ""Who ordered DILIGENCE and ATTENTION TO DETAIL!?"""

"What came first - the chicken or the egg? The rooster."

"A man walks into a bar... ... because he didn't see it."

"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can roast beef!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"[writing my first autopsy report] There was a slight mix-up initially but it turns out the guy died from an accidental autopsy"