189036
Joke of the Day
"What do you call a dog with no legs and metal balls? Sparky."
Next Joke
"""Excuse me, do you validate parking?"" I sure do, champ. *kisses your forehead* Your parking is second to none."
"I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook... They wanted books but instead they got magazines"
"Hey baby, wanna play lion? OK. You go kneel right there and I'll throw you my meat."
"Grandma's not dead... ... she just stored in the cloud now."
"I emailed my ex-girlfriend ""Are you still alive"" and she emailed back ""No"" which made me sad but also excited that they have email in hell."
"So rude of Ashton Kutcher to file divorce papers right before Demi Moore's 150th birthday."
"On one hand, this sub has gotten a little stale. On the other hand... ... you have different fingers."
"I'll never forget my grandfather last words to me ""Stop shaking the ladder you cunt!"""
"(x-post /r/meanjokes) What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster? 1 dead baby in 10 dumpsters"