188442
Joke of the Day
"What's an MLG's smartphone of choice? An HTC One M8."
Next Joke
"Wife: the library called about an overdue book *eye my copy of Outlandish Excuses for Everyday Life* ""Tell them I died in the moon wars"""
"School portraits would be way cooler if they were all mid-spaghetti-bite candids."
"What happens to Germans when they eat too many lemons? They become sour krauts."
"What do you call a row of boxers-in-training? A shitty punch line."
"when asked about the future of artificial intelligence.... some people say it will be a catastrophic cataclysmic calamity.... and some people say that's what she said."
"Sign language is pretty handy."
"I hope my tombstone reads: Matrixed 9 out of 10 bullets."
"For Christmas this year, I decided to go all out and ask Santa for something black and shiny and will go 0 to 300 in 2 seconds. I got a scale."
"What do you call a mouse with no balls? Optical."