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Joke of the Day

"My next tattoo will be ""helvetica"" written in Arial. When a woman corrects me on it, I will marry her"

"Where do Muslims go after their Friday prayer? To the Allahu Akbar"

"What do you call 50 female pigs and 50 male deer? A hundred sows and bucks."

"Despite my rock and roll lifestyle, I'm pretty sure I'm going to die via punctured gums from a tortilla chip."

"""Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once."""

"Why did the ghost cross the road? To come back from the other side."

"Ryan had to go potty real bad, but the door to the potty was Lochte."

"How did the dollar bill feel when his change started disappearing? Coincerned"

"A Nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket ...and says ""some asshole's got my pen"""

"It's only been a few days, but I'm starting to forget everything I knew about Mitch Romley."