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Joke of the Day

"Wait just a minute! You're not Jennifer Aniston! Oh, you got me with that avi. Well played. I knew it was to good to be true."

"So I was having sex the other day"

"How many Redditors does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One + all... One to screw in the lightbulb, the rest just bitch that it is a repost."

"Me: Im still mad at you for last night Hub: Well Today is the 1st. Which means that happened last month. Which means youre being ridiculous"

"Just blew my nose so hard that it got down on one knee & proposed."

"I asked a beautiful homeless girl if I could taker her home with me. She said, ""Yes!"" With a big smile... But that quickly changed when I walked away with the cardboard box that she lived in."

"One time I walked in to a pole..... ...... and, uh, I don't remember."

"A pirate goes to the doctor, worried the moles on his back are cancerous ""It's ok"" says the Doctor ""They're benign"" ""Count 'em again Doc"" says the pirate. ""I reckon there be at least ten"

"Do I have friends? Are we allowed to count the enemies of my enemies? Then yes, I have a bunch of friends."

"Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocaine during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication"