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Joke of the Day

"Finish this sentence: I like my coffee like I like my _____. I like my coffee like I like my coffee: recursive."

"Five emos in a room A study has shown that if you put five emos in a room, one of them will eventually kill himself because he wont have a corner to cry in."

"[Me]: ""I have hat-like reflexes"" [You]: Don't you mean cat-like reflexes? [Me]: *sitting on top of your head* ""Nope"""

"How do you catch a rabbit? You hide in a field and make carrot noises."

"Q: Which of the following doesn't belong: wife meat eggs blow job? A: The blow job. You can beat your wife your eggs or your meat; but you just can't beat a blow job."

"*moon landing* That's one small step for man, one giant leap for updog ""What's updog?"" NOT MUCH JUST WALKING ON THE MOON WHAT'S UP WITH YOU"

"Why don't ghosts like rainy days? Because it dampens their souls!!!!"

"A husband walks into the bedroom... ... and hands his wife 2 Advils. She says: ""But honey, I don't have a headache!"" ... To which he replies: ""Aha, I got you! Let's have sex then!"""

"How are pimples and a priest different? Pimples don't come on your face until you are 12."

"Did you all hear about Diarrhea being hereditary? It supposedly runs in your Jeans."