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Joke of the Day

"A retard and a Christian walk into a bar.... the Christian says ""do you believe in god?"", and the retard says ""what do I look like? , some kind of retard?"""

"How do you get a nun pregnant? by having sex with her"

"I told my friends a joke about airplanes... ...but it went way over their heads."

"What do you call 1,000 liberals at the bottom of the ocean? A good start! **an old joke that my dad used to tell at every party. You could replace ""liberals"" with pretty much anything."

"INTERVIEWER: Says here you have sloth-like reflexes? ME: *calls interviewer 3 years later* That is correct."

"Don't make me drop my bean curd... ... or I'll lose my tempeh."

"What is the greatest part about women's hockey? Their pads last for three periods"

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The bitch can suck my dick in the dark for all I care...."

"""Please ma'am! How do you spell ichael?"" The teacher was rather bewildered. ""Don't you mean Michael?"" she asked. ""No ma'am. I've written the 'M' already."""

"Yes, I absolutely want to hear about your cat's medication."