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Joke of the Day

"Multiple reports claiming Sting has been kidnapped The Police still have no lead."

"If you ever get cold, just stand in a corner it's usually about 90 degrees."

"what do you call chess players bragging in a hotel lobby? chess nuts boasting in an open foyer"

"My boss said to me, ""you're the worst train driver ever. How many have you derailed this year?"" I said, ""I'm not sure; it's hard to keep track."""

"Million Dollar Idea: Teach pugs to DJ, create a new genre of music...pugstep."

"I missed a call from a girl last night... I missed a call from a girl last night. I called her back, she said she must've butt dialed me. I said, ""Maybe your butt knows what it wants."""

"Why was the calendar nervous? It's days were numbered!"

"Fat women are like hydrogen single and abundant"

"I slept with an acrobat once. She was lousy in bed. It was like Cirque de So-So lay."

"Is one of the steps in the P90X workout to tell everyone on Facebook that you're doing it?"