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Joke of the Day

"Did you guys hear about the kid getting arrested for bringing a clock to school? Sources say that the teachers were alarmed."

"This one time I was hit on by Anthony Kiedis. I only had two options, either give it away... or flea"

"Joke of the Day 6/12/14 The other day, I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up,and I said "" Did you get my drift?""."

"What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Gary Glitter? 10 ""number 1's"" and a not guilty verdict"

"What celestial body do you give your sweetie on valentines day? An exoplanet."

"How did the shellfish win the underwater beauty pageant? Using saxitoxin."

"The reason why there aren't much female superheroes is that you can't expect a girl to wear the same superhero costume twice in a month"

"Being a mom means being the first one up in the morning, the last one to bed at night, and the only one drinking during church."

"There are 3 kinds of people in this world 1) Those who are bad at maths 2) Those that are good at maths"

"I'm not allowed to use the credit card anymore, last month I bought 43 falcons"