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Joke of the Day

"I'm so dependent on the google ""did you mean ____?"" that i barely bother to spell anything even remotely correctly"

"What did the baby corn say to the Mom corn ? Where is Popcorn ?"

"Spilled my bottle of sleeping pills, and now they're wide awake."

"My daughters took turns tracing each other over and over with chalk. Now it looks like 25 children were murdered in my driveway."

"What did Japan say when it heard the US had an atomic bomb? Did you make that Fermi?"

"A Roman guy walks into a bar He holds up two fingers and says ""five beers please"""

"Why didn't Hitler participate in the marathon? ... Because he can't finish a race."

"When a chemist says you're gold...... ......it just means you're easily replaceable"

"Turns out the ""Mac"" guy from those ""Mac and PC"" commercials is an avid Windows supporter. What a Long con."

"Rob Ford..too soon? *Some* people though it would be nice if Rob Ford could be mayor for tumor years."