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Joke of the Day

"Was at a party the other day, there was a guitar there. I picked it up and someone asked if I could play wonderwall I said maybe"

"I swear to god dude, if you say ""But what if we get arrested?"" One more time you're out of the group."

"Whats the difference between sex and US Presidental elections? In sex,the decision to choose the cunt or the asshole is a pleasure"

"Why Did The Stadium Get Hot After The Game? Because all the fans left."

"What did the Jewish pirate say when he heard his wife died? Argh, shiva me timbers"

"These cat babies are straight up gangsta. I'm going to name them all after Friends characters. The one I hate will be Ross."

"Growing up means you start to find it creepy that your dad's pet name for your mom is ""Squirty"""

"What did Allen Ginsberg say upon being intoduced to Lawrence Ferlinghetti? Howl do you do ?"

"""Jessica wasn't usually dead. So when we found her dead we immediately knew something was wrong."" -Investigation Discovery"

"What do you get if you cross a SJW and Jason Voorhees? Social justice."