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Joke of the Day

"Shoplifting may be wrong in a general sense, but what if, for example, I'm bored of paying for things"

"So I have had this joke in my mind for awhile but cannot figure out the best delivery... Why is it ok for police to keep rape kits in their cars? but if I have one, I am some sort of criminal."

"How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? None. The light bulb will change itself when it's ready."

"See if this carries thru in txt 1)Knock knock. 2)Who's there? 1)Interrupting chicken. 2)Inter.. 1)..BUK BKOCK!!!!"

"What do you call a horse that plays the violin? Fiddler on the hoof!"

"Don't ever compete against Heinz... You're always going to play catch up."

"I tried playing UNO with all my Mexican friends... ... but they kept stealing all the green cards!"

"My penis is nicknamed ""The Titanic""... ""Because it's so big?"" ""No,because it is a tragedy."""

"If by chipper you mean woodchipper, then yes, I have a chipper personality."

"I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis."