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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a former CIA agent when a winter storm hits? Snowed-in"

"I keep throwing up when I count in French My doctor thinks I might have a huit allergy"

"There is a disturbing amount of product placement in my dreams."

"Do you know what is heart warming? That even the most Orthodox Jew, and the cruelest of all the people of Al-Qaeda, will look for the same thing once they get down from a plane. A Synagogue."

"In some ways it's sucks that we are smart enough to understand the futility of life. But luckily we're also smart enough to invent alcohol."

"I'm making a horror film where a sadistic snowman sets death traps for other snowmen and they have to melt bits of themselves to escape.It's called Thaw."

"Marriage means always wanting to scream ""Shut the fuck up"" but instead saying ""OK honey""."

"If you're going to go house hunting, try to blend in with your surroundings. Wear aluminum siding."

"Why Did the Italian Go to the Sauna? For a self'a steam."

"Target had a credit card breach? But only with in-store purchases, not online? More proof you're better off staying home with no pants on."