18556

Joke of the Day

"I'll never understand why anyone would buy one of those flesh-colored Volkswagen beetle cars, it's like driving a giant testicle."

"I was thinking about donating some money to my local hospital... But then I realized they'd probably just spend it on drugs."

"My doctor told me to watch my drinking. So I'm off to find a bar with a mirror."

"What do you call a cow that gets hit by a car? A dead cow! (My 5-year old made up this joke)"

"Being sick and tired of all the excess fat, one day I decided to burn it off. And then I started running... ..from the police for setting my wife on fire."

"Mechanic: what seems to be the problem? Me: nice try buddy, that's what I'm paying you for"

"My wife always takes up two parking spaces. She ought to go on a diet."

"I've been informed that ""Ped Xing"" means ""Pedestrian Crossing."" So what? Child molesters on horseback should get out of my way, too."

"What's James bonds fettish? Bondage"

"Please don't share 9/11 jokes, I lost my dad on 9/11 He took over 2500 infidels with him"