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Joke of the Day

"They say marriage is like a three ring circus ... There is the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering ..."

"French joke Why are the streets of France lined with trees? So the Germans can march in the shade."

"Guy: ""Do you have a lighter?"" Me: ""Yep"" Guy: ""You smoke?"" Me: ""No, you just never know when you're gonna need to light someone on fire."""

"My father thinks himself an expert at cutting through busy sidewalks. I consider his ability rather pedestrian."

"Eat that damn door We are waiting"

"the flight attendant came down the aisle holding out a bag of trash to me and i was like ""sure what the hell"" and grabbed a couple pieces"

"Hi, welcome to Starbucks! How can we spell your name incorrectly today?"

"A photon arrives at the airport As he checks in, security asks him: ""Do you not have any luggage?"" The photon replies, ""No, I'm travelling light""."

"Do you know what would make this sub better? No more /u/JokeExplainBot"

"What's the atheist's view on God? Nahweh."