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Joke of the Day

"One idiot said to the other ""You know there are really only three kinds of people in the world: those who can count and those who can't."

"I like cheese Just like cheese man"

"Frankenstein: Help I've got a short circuit! Igor: Don't worry I'll lengthen it."

"What lies on the ground 100 feet up in the air and smells? A dead centipede."

"My girlfriend just texted me this: Babe,myspacebarisbroken.IneedanalternativeASAP! Anybody know what 'ternative' means?"

"How many FIFA officials does it take to change a light bulb? **None**. They operate in the **dark**."

"How many photos of Kanye West do you suppose Kanye West has on his phone? More than 1,000?"

"Blood is Thicker than water, but maple syrup is Thicker than blood. Therefore, pancakes are more important than family."

"I believe it was Alexander Graham Bell that once said... How did you get this number?"

"When the professor starts off the semester asking ""Why are you here?"" So I can get a job."