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Joke of the Day

"A percussionist gets punched. What does it do? It would block."

"I just got back from my best friend's funeral. He died after being hit on the head with a tennis ball. It was a lovely service."

"A father says to his son, Father: son stop masturbating so much or you'll go blind Son: dad I'm over here"

"Trump is blaming Sanders for the violence at his rally... Because you can't truly be Hitler until you blame a Jew for all your problems."

"Girl you got the brains of a seal. Wanna get smashed at the club?"

"The Mancave is where I change into my Manman costume."

"Knock knock. Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy me rollin. They hatin. Patrollin and tryna catch me ridin dirty."

"What did the Dalai Lama say to the guy in the kebab shop? ""Make me one with everything."""

"Once a teacher said nobody was buying my cool guy act but he dropped his clipboard and there was a drawing of me in sunglasses on it."

"Q: When is a school paper not a school paper? A: When it's turned into the teacher."