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Joke of the Day
"Why is your wife annoying? Because she is always jalapeno business."
Next Joke
"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - T2 Barbie ...a study in silver"
"Netflix asked 'How often do you watch period pieces?' 'About once a month'"
"Why is sex like signing-on? Both involve a log-in."
"I love when I'm walking closely behind a girl and she starts to speed walk away. It's like she knew I wanted to race all along."
"I've done a lot of volunteer work for unwed mothers. Just helping them get their start."
"Why do husbands typically die before their wives? They want to."
"Why don't hipsters like fishing? It's too mainstream."
"At a business meeting: ""How about SuperCupid?"" ""No, expectations will be too high"" ""GreatCupid?"" ""Lower"" ""Uhhh, OKCupid?"" ""Brilliant"""
"*accidentally summons malevolent demon at a seance* I WILL HAUNT YOUR HOME FOREVER! [4 days later] YOU KNOW, YOU COULD CLEAN UP OCCASIONALLY"