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Joke of the Day

"Cop: we have you surrounded! Get down on the ground now! Cardboard Man: sigh not again *cops start breakdancing*"

"That bitch... Two necrophiliacs were chatting on the phone. One says to the other,""So how's the girlfriend?"" He replies, ""Eh, the rottin cunt split on me last night."""

"looking for roommate, utilities included. if you're taller than me, i get to ride your shoulders when we are in the same room. no exceptions"

"What do you call a huge pile of cats? A Meowntain"

"My PhD student claims to have made a breakthrough in hyperbolic mathematics Turns out he was just exaggerating"

"What did R. Kelly say to the teenage girl fan? Urine for a surprise."

"What do pirates have in common with photons? They both travel at c"

"You still have 10 more hours to lose all the weight from your last New Year's resolution. Hurry !"

"Women with horses are rich versions of cat ladies."

"What did the closed can say to the half opened can? YOU'RE BEING UNCANNY!"