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Joke of the Day

"What's the worst thing Willie Nelson can tell you while giving you a handjob? I'm not Willie Nelson"

"Why didn't the girl cross the street? She didn't have the balls"

"If cops were really public servants they'd stop pulling me over and start cleaning my house."

"Bill Clinton rapes a woman... Hillary Clinton then says to him... ""Bill did you rape another woman?"" Get it? Bill Clinton rapes women...."

"cats are the best because you can pet one while you're talking to someone and look totally evil"

"A frog is sitting on a lily pad in the middle of what is clearly a river. He shouts to a toad on the shore, ""Hey, look at me, I'm on a lake!"" The toad yells back, ""Naw man, you're in de-nile"""

"What does a ghost pick out of his nose? Boo-gers"

"A good pick up line to use on a pregnant woman is ""Got room for one more in there?"""

"Me: smells like upyou'refreetogo in here. Cop: what's upyou'refreetogo? Me: *finger guns* catch ya later Cop: aww damn lol got me again"

"What does a forward thinking person say? wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww"