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Joke of the Day

"A guard is patrolling when he sees something moving in the bushes.... ""Who's in there?!"" He yells He gets a reply ""jean-claude van damme"" All 4 of you,get out!"

"Who is a vampire likely to fall in love with ? The girl necks door."

"How do you circumcised a whale? Four skin divers"

"Did you hear about jared from subway? ""Yea he lost like 200 pounds"""

"So a bum asked me for same change... A homeless man asked me for some change today. I said to him, ""Sorry, pal. You should know better than me that no one in this place has got _innocence_."""

"Did you hear about the man who hid in the refrigerator? He thought he would be cool."

"Cheesy pun I once had a dream about cheese. It was all gouda until a muenster appeared and started chasing me"

"apparently syriza gained a lot of support for a NO vote with a online meme campaign beware of greeks bearing GIFs, i say."

"doctor: ""is there anything that runs in the family?"" wife: ""hm not really"" me: ""the dog jogs a lot"""

"Why was the panda crying? He had a bambooboo. Aonther one from my 9 year old."