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Joke of the Day

"Daniel said his mother had one foot in the grave The other one had proved to difficult for workers to scrape off the motorway"

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"Rats are under rated. Just check your dictionary."
"Bill Cosby's business card... Sorry I missed you, I was in while you were out."
"If you watch The Matrix backwards, a young man slowly comes down from a wild acid trip before returning to his low-level tech job."
"What do you call a white girl with an ass? A honkey with a donk-ey"
"doc said my liver is failing but i think it's just not applying itself"
"I complain about my kids a lot but I'd be lost without them. Lost in my expensive sports car in designer clothes. Or lost in my clean house."
"Life is like a box of chocolates... It runs out faster for fat people."
"On the bus I was sitting on the bus and this super hot Thai girl gets on and sits next to me I think to myself ""Please don't get a boner, please don't get a boner, please don't get a boner"" She did."
"Why do hippies wear patchouli? So blind people can hate them, too."