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Joke of the Day

"I'd like to explain what happened before the big bang Unfortunately there's no time"

"Did you know that gullible is the only English word that is not in the dictionary? I'm serious, it isn't. Go look it up and see for yourself."

"People used to laugh at me when I would say ""I want to be a comedian"", well nobody's laughing now"

"Cows How does a farmer count cows? On a cowculater :D:D (ya its crap)"

"I was tucking my son in last night, and he tells me that his teacher is ""an idiot"" and she's ""out to get him."" Which is just the last thing you want to hear when your kid's home schooled."

"Okay restaurants. Enough with the clever bathroom signs. A simple M and F will do. Sincerely, drunk people."

"What is the most racist house chore? Laundry, because you have to sort the whites from the colors."

"what is your least favorite type of sandwich? Whoops, wrong sub."

"There's a couple flies in my room... I'm trying to sleep and they're bugging me."

"""Hey Ernie do you want some ice cream?"" ""Sherbet."""