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Joke of the Day

"How many animals can you fit in a pair of pantyhose? A couple calves, an ass, ten little piggies, a beaver, a shit load of hares, and a fish that no one can seem to find!"

"A guy walks into a doctors office with a carrot in his ear and a piece of celery up his nose. The doctor told him he wasn't eating right."

"I saw a fight between a group of Gay guys.... Blows were exchanged."

"You think you're hardcore? Watch THIS! *Drinks vodka straight from the potato*"

"I want to write ""I miss you"" on a rock and throw it at your face so that you'll know how much it hurts to miss you."

"Sometimes I wonder if these old men sitting on the benches in the mall waiting on their wives to finish shopping were old when they sat down!?"

"A Boston Marathon runner was asked about his experience. He said it was a blast."

"What were people doing during the last ice age? Chillin."

"In honor of Columbus Day I'm going to drive around until I get lost then make myself at home in the first clearly inhabited house I find"

"The definition of Baroque: A time when there is no Monet."