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Joke of the Day

"Who would won in a wrestling match; Lemmy or God? Trick question, lemmy is god... R.I.P. Edit* win not won damnit..."

Next Joke
 
"Mother Earth: I'm not a regular mom. I'm a Cool Mom. [humans pollute the atmosphere and destroy nature] Earth: This is fine. I'm a Cool Mom"
"I haven't heard anything from my doctor since my ear surgery. Or anyone, for that matter."
"What is your favorite thing the new iPhone can do? Mine is distract me from my own mortality"
"What does the hippy say when you try to kick them off your couch? Namaste."
"How do you blindfold an Asian? With Dental Floss"
"My brother and I share the same birthday. We aren't twins, our parents are just fucking cheap."
"I heard that a few of the /r/Science mods also moderate /r/Jokes... [deleted]"
"What's the worst thing about having to kiss Grandma? When the damn coffin lid falls and hits you in the head."
"I told my physics teacher I had a problem with gravity. But he told me to drop it."