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Joke of the Day

"My son was thrown out of school today for letting a girl in his class wank him off. I said,""Son that's three schools this year. Maybe teaching isn't for you."""

"What happens if you fart in church You have to sit in your own pew"

"A member of Isis is having a bad day... It's having a crisis"

"The United States has such bad luck It's almost as if it was build on thousands of ancient Indian burial grounds."

"My wife moans at me to say I did' instead of I done' because it's not proper grammar. Easier said than did."

"I have an eating disorder. I'm about to eat dis order of pizza, dis order of fries and dis order of nuggets."

"My grandpa has the heart of a lion. And a lifetime ban at the San Diego zoo."

"Yo mama is so old. Yo mama is so old that in her history class they just wrote down what they where doing."

"I'd like to tell a joke about pedophiles but they're fucking immature assholes."

"I hate when Spotify is down and I have to listen to Apple Music on my 128 GB Rose Gold iPhone 6s Plus like some kind of homeless person"