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Joke of the Day

"Two necrophiles are discussing their love lives. Necrophile 1: What happened with you and Brenda? Necrophile 2: Ah, you know how it is. . .the rotten cunt split on me."

"I have never understood telephones ,i mean, how can sound travel at the speed of light"

"89% of being a parent is telling my kids to put on shoes before we leave the house and then getting in the car wearing my slippers."

"Did you hear about the depressed lactose-intolerant woman? She committed soya-cide."

"Why did the chicken double-cross the road? To change sides."

"Why is santa so jolly? He knows where all the naughty girls live. Why am I so jolly? I stole his list."

"Who is tall dark and a great dancer ? Dark Raver !"

"Did you guys hear about the joke about the high wall? It's so funny, I'm still trying to get over it."

"Why do Central Americans hop the U.S. Border in groups of 4 or more? Because the sign says no tres-passing."

"People accept that God exists & created the universe without evidence or proof but if you tell them Facebook is down they immediately check."