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Joke of the Day

"Men resolve a fight with a fist fight. Women resolve a fight with years of backstabbing, name calling, rumor spreading & social exclusion."

"Why does Star Wars have 100s of people using lasers to fight and literally NOBODY using them to etch cute wooden drink coasters"

"I've got an Intracranial Embolism... ...at least, that's what my doctor told him when I mentioned that I had Bad Blood stuck in my head."

"What do Hillary Clinton and OJ Simpson have in common? They got away with it."

"What did the Cannibal get when he was late to dinner? They gave him the cold shoulder."

"There are three kinds of people in the world... ...Those who can count, and those who can't."

"How many Sand People does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No one knows. They ride single file to hide their numbers."

"Monica Lewinsky says she WILL endorse Hillary for president... ..says Hillary Clinton ""doesn't suck."""

"""Mommy, Mommy - I hate walking around in circles!"" ""Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor..."""

"What do you call Harrison Ford making a Venn diagram? Comparrison Ford!"