181825

Joke of the Day

"I've read Plumbing for idiots' twice and I still haven't got a clue what I'm doing. I guess it's going to take another few reads before this sinks in."

"A Morning After pill but for over eating."

"What is the United States doing to fight pedophiles? Child Obesity."

"When someone asks you if you've met their kids... ... it turns out that the proper reply is NOT ""Yes, heheh."""

"I just farted in an elevator. Which was wrong on so many levels."

"Police: How did they break in? Me: I have a fake garden rock w/a key inside. Police: They found it? Me: They threw it through the window."

"""We've been doing this for years, I simply can't be bothered thinking up another long scientific name. Drink?"" - people who named the fly."

"It is completely unreasonable that family members are expecting me to remember things like what the names of their kids are. Preposterous."

"Perverts and dogwalkers are the only people who go through life excited for someone else to take a dump."

"Not to mention trempe If you jumped off the bridge in Paris, you'd be in Seine."