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Joke of the Day

"The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action."

"What do you call a boy-band composed of stoners? No Direction."

"John and Nancy sitting in a tree, H-I-D-I-N-G-F-R-O-M-T-H-E-L-O-C-A-L-A-U-T-H-O-R-I-T-I-E-S-B-E-C-A-U-S-E-T-H-E-Y-K-I-L-L-E-D-A-D-O-G"

"Next month on the 13th, the date will be 13/13/13."

"What do you get when you shoot a Mexican golfer? A hole in Juan"

"Kidnapping Catnapping keeps you well rested, kidnapping gets you arrested."

"My wife and I were supposed to have a conversation about my erectile disfunction. It never came up."

"how can you tell you whenyou're in a ring of fire? When you reach for the Preparation H but accidentally grabbed a BenGay."

"What is a capitalist's favorite fetish? Vore, because it's all about consumption"

"A hipster walks into a bar... and says ""This place sucks now, it used to be better before all the hipsters took over."""