181570

Joke of the Day

"How do you start a rave in Africa? Glue a piece of toast to the ceiling."

"If you run in front of a car, you get tired. If you run behind it, you get exhausted."

"Laundry Day Me: Tell me about this lipstick on your shirt. Him: Babe, I can explain! Me: Don't care. Just ask her the brand and shade name."

"What does a Thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll."

"So, I measured my penis with one of those digital rulers... ...Anyone know how to convert LOL into inches?"

"What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis."

"However rich and successful you are, your cat will never see you as an equal."

"I have no idea how the cavemen could afford to eat paleo."

"What do a Professional Fifa Player and a Rapist have in common? They're both going to score, even if you don't want them to."

"I love the smell of my f5 key... It is very refreshing"