181309

Joke of the Day

"I tried to put two apples together But then I got a pear"

"I hate when job recruiters ask me where I see myself in 5 years. Like come on, dude, I don't have 2020 vision."

"I gave my sister away at her wedding. I stood up & shouted ""SHE USED TO BE A MAN!"""

"Cannibals do not like to eat vaginas. .....Because it tastes like fish. ;-.>"

"HER: I'd invite you in, but I never kill on a first date ME: kill? HER: haha I meant kiss stupid autocorrect ME: we are talking out loud"

"Princess Dianna had dandruff They found her head and shoulders in the glovebox."

"What do you call a cannibal who eats quadriplegics? Vegetarians."

"How many dead prostitutes we need to change a lightbulb ? Certainly not three, because in my basement is still dark."

"There are two pronunciations for uranus. Ur-anus and Ura-nus I prefer ur-mom"

"How many Ferguson police does it take to change a light bulb? None, they'll just shoot the room for being black."