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Joke of the Day

"I read an interesting stat online the other day.... Apparently 1 in two and a half men are HIV positive."

"What do you call a gorilla that got shot even though it didn't want to do anything wrong? King Kong"

"Nice try, horror movies, but the scariest thing I've ever seen is still a 4-year-old holding a sharpie without the cap."

"I just found out I'm an amateur nudist. I thought I was pretty good at it but apparently if you don't have the right certifications they'll call the mall security."

"Why was the man with no arms or legs the BEST party host? Because no matter what, when you get to the front door you will always see a welcome Matt."

"A friend of mine collects National Geographic magazines, he really has a lot of issues."

"""Let's get readyyyyy to punch a little but mostly hug!"" -honest boxing announcer"

"Whitney Houston is 3 Years sober! Wow! Never thought it would happen"

"They say not to text and drive, but I still feel totally fine after like two texts"

"What is the worst joke you have ever Heard? I'll start it off: Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent."