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Joke of the Day

"Some people knocked on my door & asked for a small donation. for building a local swimming pool. I gave them a glass of water."

"Just saw a car with a license plate that says FLSH ME. Ok, douche. What are you, a dead goldfish? Flush yourself."

"A whale asks his dad ""Dad where do I come from"" The father whale replies, ""well from my penis"" ""Oh. Thanks."" Responded.the junior whale ""You're whalecum"""

"Why do people hate playing uno with Mexicans? They always take the green cards"

"I'm 10 times more likely to get mugged in Colorado than I am in New York City. Because I don't live in New York City."

"Guess what? Chicken butt!"

"Who's going to lose the upcoming election? Society."

"do you like fish sticks? if you do you must be a gay fish"

".@Beyonce can you feed my turtles while I'm on vacation"

"What do you call a man in the ocean with no arms or legs? Bob."