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Joke of the Day

"*rubs magic lamp*rubs harder and faster*genie semen sprays everywhere*"

Next Joke
 
"Me: I have a secret *I take off my wig* Her: I don't care still I love you *I smile, take off my bald cap* Me: you passed the final test"
"I've decided never to buy anything off the Internet again, after getting conned last week. I ordered what was supposed to be the world's largest cardboard box, but the one it came in was bigger."
"A nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket... Suddenly she realises that some asshole has her pen."
"Anytime I'm watching something on tv my wife starts talking to me as if her words are going to expire if she doesn't use them."
"I don't mean to be a party pooper but... where's your bathroom?"
"Did you hear about the little person psychic who broke out of jail? Police are looking for a small medium at large."
"I'm just hoping Angelina Jolie hooks-up with Val Kilmer... the ""Vagelina"" headlines would be priceless!"
"Why will the USA never go bankrupt? It will just host a telethon."
"Well excuse me all to hell. I thought you'd be flattered with a mosaic of pictures of you at the gym. No, you don't need to call the police."