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Joke of the Day

"What does a German soccer player call his cleats? Das Boots"

"What do you call it when a man has a beer in each hand? Irish handcuffs."

"I'm very anti-slavery, but boy do I hate laundry."

"the best way to hang up on someone is to do it in the middle of YOUR OWN sentence. that way, they never suspect you hung up on them."

"Why do medicine boxes always have a little bit of cotton in them? To remeber the black man of what he did before he dealt drugs."

"I REALIZED THAT I AM THE VICTIM After ten years of marriage, the wife asks her husband: - Honey, are you by nature a winner or a loser? - Honey, over the years I realized that I am the victim ..."

"Tip of the day: When there's a will...find a way to be in it!"

"Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 10. He replied, ""I still love Vista, baby""."

"The other day I walked up to a homeless person. 'Knock knock' 'Who's there' 'I thought you were homeless!'"

"More people die from choking on sweet packaging than they do from the sweets themselves... Gums don't kill people. Wrappers do."