179739

Joke of the Day

"During a job interview yestarday I poured some water into a cup and it overflowed slightly ""Nervous?"" asked the interviewer, I simply replied ""No I always give 110%"""

"How can I know hundreds of digits of pi But not know the digits of your phone number?"

"I still have no idea what the fuck Grape Nuts are supposed to be."

"What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird"

"Some guys robbed a bank, and to escape, they blew a hole in the wall... the police are looking into it."

"I'm in a very serious relationship we never laugh."

"How to measure the perfect amount of pasta Step 1: Measure out the perfect amount of pasta. Step 2: Wrong."

"How about a restaurant where the minute you walk in you lose cell service and your camera app is disabled we'll call it ""ENJOY YOUR LIVES"""

"Two blondes are drawing money from an ATM. One of them says to the other... I love the sound of money being printed."

"I guess it's time to lose some weight. I cut myself shaving and gravy came out..."