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Joke of the Day

"How busy can you actually be if you just took the time to change your online status to say so."

"""Can't touch this."" ""Can't touch this."" ""Can't touch this."" --MC Hammer giving a Museum tour"

"What's the difference between your mom and your dad? Your dad still sucks dick."

"Q. What do a hurricane a tornado and a redneck divorce all have in common? A. Someone's going to lose their trailer..."

"Did you hear about the stupid turkey? It was looking forward to Christmas!"

"At what time does Sean Connery like to watch the Williams sisters play? Tennish."

"The corner of this table hurt me and made me cry, so now we're dating"

"I'm dating an x-ray technician... But I don't know what she sees in me."

"What's the difference between a really comedian and someone who can't complete a joke?"

"Did you hear Mr. Fanatic started delivering gifts to children? They call him the elastic clause."