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Joke of the Day

"Two things you can always be certain about when it comes to women: 1) They're always cold. 2) It's somehow your fault."

"lets modernize Hey Arnold fellas this will be hilarious... Hey Ackbar! ""move it towelhead"""

"What does a stripper do to her asshole before work? She drops him off at band practice."

"Who did Fat Albert accuse of leaving a burning cross on his lawn? ""The Kaaay Kaaay Kaaaaay!"""

"What do you call a girl on her period? Call her next week."

"A Jewish Kid... Asks his dad to borrow $5 his dad replies with ""$4 dollars?! what do you need $3 dollars for?!"""

"How to make-out - 1. Hold her close 2. Kiss passionately 3. Don't mention the budget deficit or your father"

"Why are elephants wiser than chickens ? Have you ever heard of Kentucky Fried Elephant ?!"

"What do you call a child afraid of Santa? Claustrophobic"

"Don't take this the wrong way, but you're all horrible sinners and you're going to hell."