179571
Joke of the Day
"I had sex with both of the Olsen twins. But that was before they were famous."
Next Joke
"How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one."
"When people shorten words for no reason it makes me want to commit murds."
"I told my friend that Dracula and I had sex with my 12 inch penis. He refused to believe me... I said, ""I know it's hard to believe, it's a lot to take into a Count."""
"I want to tattoo ""platform 9 and 3/4"" over my ass 'cause you wouldn't think you'd get in there but you can Edit:words"
"Hospital... A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, ""No change yet."""
"What do you call it when you make fun of someone's gambling addiction? Slot shaming."
"Mood ring I got my wife a mood ring. When she's in a good mood it turns a beautiful shade of blue. When she's in a bad mood it leaves an ugly red mark on my forehead."
"Work meeting Boss: it's come to my attention that someone has been eating out of the trash! Everyone, including his pet raccoon looks at me"
"Slowly, Waldo's wife and Mr. Sandiego started putting the pieces together"