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Joke of the Day

"if someone else is in the picture with you why do some people still call it a ""selfie""?....that's a ""groupie"""

"What do you call a frisbee that's more than a friend? Frisbae"

"What's the dirtiest thing ever said at a gay bar? ""Excuse me sir, do you mind if I push in your stool?"""

"Once killed a man with my SuperSoaker. (I'd been pumping it for a REALLY long time.)"

"I spy with my little eye. A kid terrified with my literally little eye."

"[outside eden] Adam: This isnt so bad Eve: Yea Adam: [mosquito lands on arm] Wtf is this [5 min later] Adam: [banging on gates] WE'RE SORRY"

"I won't get a girl pregnant because I only have sex at night, when my sperm is asleep."

"I put a couple of t's in my beer last night. I think it made it better."

"Tip Of the Day: You can easily avoid bruising your thigh by not staring at a female jogger and then walking into a fire hydrant."

"Why did Hitler kill himself? He finally got the gas bill."