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Joke of the Day

"A man tell his waitress he would like to order a beer When she asks what brand of beer he would like to drink he replies with, ""Root"". And dads all over the world sighed with satisfaction ."

"What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey!"

"how do you keep an asshole in suspense?"

"Sexism Hurts Everyone I mean, I'm a sexist, and I can't get a girlfriend, so who the fuck is going to do my laundry?"

"My 4-year-old thinks the 5-second rule means she can eat anything off the floor if she waits 5-seconds first. That M&M was from last Easter."

"What's the difference between a honda and a Porsche? Paul Walker wouldn't be caught dead in a Honda"

"A racist, a sexist, a homophobe, and a idiot walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and smiles. ""Welcome back, Mr. Trump!"" he says."

"Don't pay your taxes. Get sent to a cool ass prison. Boom, now taxes pay you. Life hack."

"I gave away all of my dead batteries Free of charge."

"Why are farmers cruel? Because they pull corn by the ears."