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Joke of the Day

"Cop: Lemme see your papers Me: Okay Cop: These are rolling papers Me: Would you look at that Cop: Sir are you high? Me: What are you, a cop?"

"I don't know why I thought Palm Sunday had something to do with masturbation. My apologies to those waiting to use the confessional."

"Why did no one like the cannibal that started eating his own body? He was too full of himself."

"I put the STD in ""STUD"" ... all I need is ""U"""

"Actual advice Mallard in a recent interview denounced his internet fame. It was quite a pro duck shun."

"My friend told me my mustache makes me looks like Jeffery Dahmer. I said, ""Thanks. I've always wanted a killer stache."""

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Button ! Button who ? Button in is not polite !"

"I am a virtuous woman, that's why I cost more!"

"The barman said, ""We don't serve particles faster than light."" A tachyon walked into the bar."

"Why did the baker have brown hands? He kneaded a pooh"