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Joke of the Day

"Be careful when you ROFL! I once heard a joke in a scissor factory... It left me in stitches."

"I'm so high, I just tried to Google ""My favorite songs""."

"I was raised as an only child. Which really pissed my brothers off."

"Rupert Grint bursts into the room, ""Mum, I just got a part in the Harry Potter movie!"" ""Serious?"" ""No, Ron."""

"*sees person I know in a crowd* *waves enthusiastically* * realizes I don't know person* * changes enthusiastic wave to awkward fist pump*"

"If you are considering decorating your car for Christmas, please seek immediate mental help."

"Why did the salmon cross the road? To get to the front page"

"I learned today that I'm still a reddit noob."

"(Describing Guy Fieri to sketch artist): Literally a flaming hot cheeto"

"What do you call Mike Tyson without any arms? Whatever you want"