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Joke of the Day

"Girl: I dumped my last boyfriend cause he always gave short answers. I never knew what he was thinking. That's so annoying, right? Me: Word"

"What did the hail storm say to the roof? -Hang onto your shingles this will be no ordinary sprinkles"

"People are like snowflakes. When they pile up on my car windshield, it's difficult to drive."

"I just thought of the most badass hobbit name: Oak Smashfoot. Oh god, I'm so tired."

"Me: It stands for Greatest Of All Time Jeweller: I just don't think your wife will want ""THE GOAT IS MINE"" inscribed on her wedding ring"

"German sausage jokes are the wurst ..."

"[REPOST] How many narcissists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. He stands in place while the whole world revolves around him."

"When I die, I want you to carry my casket So you can let me down one last time."

"In the beginning, God made Heaven and Earth... The rest was made in China."

"girl are u a hyperlink in an email from my grandma, because I think u gave me a serious virus"